Dancing on this earth for a short time and yet I ask how do I last forever? Truth, reality says never in human form. So what do I leave? I leave a mosaic of gifts and footprints. All the parts of me create a mosaic of beauty, wonder, awe and love.
At times ego presents a strong case of illusions of which I do battle in hopes of winning something and in that belief comes a death, a murder that wastes the perfection with which I was born. That is a picture, perhaps of only black and white, no color. I realize then that I am battling to win a prize of death. That can only come from a fear of living. In my battles with the other, blaming, ridicule, attacking and feeling attacked all really were about my own illusionary beliefs because of the fears I created.
When I decided to change, to choose life rather than fear it, movement began inside me that at first startled me. A sadness came forth and remained for awhile. Tears flowed down my face non-stop and I could not point our exactly why other than to just allow the tears to flow. After a time all the tears stopped. Then I noticed the uncomfortable sadness inside my being. I allowed the silence to reveal to me the reality I needed to discover. Soon I realized the sadness was about me, me missing parts of me. What a lonely feeling that stayed with me. I had many people connections and yet I felt very much alone. Then a deep breath manifested and then another and another. Yes, my real honest need was to embrace me and the parts of me that were wanting, waiting to be seen, heard and accepted. In that time I realized and made a commitment with certainty of what I truly wanted, who I was and began walking gloriously with confidence that each footstep would take me to my desired goal, Heaven not hell.
Soon aliveness came forth more and more throughout my being. I noticed the my footprints and rocks and hills I had created and began painting them with colors, hues of many sorts. Each experience came more alive and the mosaic I was creating began to shine with each new stroke I added. I had learned about the gifts I had been endowed since birth and began giving away these precious love offerings by committing to who I AM with what I AM.
The mosaic is not yet finished and yet each day it is complete and full of life. The beauty is that in giving, sharing with the “other” this mosaic becomes enhanced by what “we”, “us” create as the brightest mosaic of all.