Tis the season to be helpful. We are filled with good will; the desire to make a difference wherever and whenever we can. It’s human nature to want to help another have a better life, especially when we see them working so hard to make it happen.
Well, I made a phone call today that changed the course of a plan I had charted. I was going to loan my van to a dear friend who needs a vehicle to drive. Currently, I work from home and he is working outside his home. Since he needs to save money to get a new vehicle, the money he is paying a driving service to take him to and from, is making this a very slow process. It was my hope that if he could borrow my van a few days a week, then he could bank more money and get his new vehicle that much quicker.
My hopes were dashed when my insurance company informed me that unless HE had his OWN insurance policy, he would not be “street legal” to drive my van without me in the vehicle at the same time. Oh boy, of course he doesn’t have his own insurance, he has no vehicle to insure. It seemed like a case of which comes first, the chicken or the egg…
Of course, now it is back to the drawing board. However, that would be HIS drawing board. After all, this is HIS situation with which to deal. I was only trying to help. Still, I have something to accomplish here as well and that is to LET GO of the NEED to own the disappointment. Let me tell you, I was so disappointed in the results of that phone call that I didn’t want to tell him unless I had a back up plan. But that is not my role.
See, his role in this is obvious, for him to figure out how to get his needs met. My role is to get my needs met. Huh? That’s right. My need to be helpful was seeking fulfillment. This man has been a family friend for nearly 40 years. It just didn’t seem right that I couldn’t be of service in some way. Naturally, this was a plan that sounded good to both of us and appeared to be more than workable. Though this is a disappointment to me, I can choose to own that or to say, “Hey, I tried” and move along.
What will he do? I don’t know specifically but I do know that he will make his life work. After all, he has made it this far and little by little he is gaining ground. I know that one of these days, he’ll pull up in the driveway in his new car. This will turn out good.
What will I do? For starters, I will be at peace with the information I gathered. Laws are laws and as such I agree to abide. Next, I will allow myself to feel good about giving it a shot. It could have worked out the way I saw it but accepting that this wasn’t meant to be is as important to my happiness as him getting a new car will be to his. See, my happiness is up to me to provide. If it doesn’t come from the plan working out, it will come from me being okay with simply making the effort. After all, they say that the journey has greater rewards than the outcome. Translated, something GOOD WILL come of it.