You can listen to an audio version of this article, look further down.
Hello again everyone! What an awesome time to be alive, don’t you think? Well, since my last column, there’s been a lot going on in this guy’s life! I’ve moved to South Carolina, from Iowa. I’ve rescued an amazing puppy, Baby Bella. I’ve been key note speaker for multiple speaking engagements, been offered a full time position as a Spiritual Director within a Unity Spiritual Center and I am still LOVING LIFE!!
Which Brings me to the topic for this month: We are beings, not doings!
As I stated in my prior column, for whatever reason, I grew up learning to be a “Doer”. I built a corporate career up to a V.P. of Sales, gained the education to match and learned to live full out “Doing” in my attempt to succeed in life. It wasn’t until my late 20’s I started to realize what the term “people pleasing” meant and it took a few more years to realizing how much of my life I spent trying to earn love, success, fulfillment through doing. I’m so grateful I don’t have to live like that today and I’m in static to get to spend my life helping others break out of that unrewarding, unfulfilling role in their lives as well!! Today, as I’m living my passion, Coaching, Speaking, Mentoring and Writing, I know in order for me to enjoy the journey I need to look at some of my patterns and paradigms. Otherwise, what I’m doing will always lead to the same old process I instinctively followed. Work, work, and more work.
In opposition with popular belief, it’s not about the effort you place on what you are trying to accomplish so much as it’s about (REALLY) enjoying the process. And against what you may believe, by taking the time to have fun in life and let go of the task list, you will actually net more results. And quicker! Once you have a clear vision for what you would love in your life, everything forward is about unfolding. That’s what I specialize in helping people get very specific about. A clear vision!
WHAT???? You may ask.
Because I love utilizing my life as my greatest teacher into my lifes-lessons, as it shows in my book “Lifes Lessons”, I’m going to utilize an example from my life here to illustrate my point. Three weeks ago, I spent a week focusing diligently on adding additional speaking engagements and initiating another group of coaching clients. I sent the emails, made the phone calls, reached out. I came up with three pages of to-do’s. You know, the kind of efforts one goes through in order to ensure success, as if the control of success is really within the “doing.” I’m sure a lot of folks can share in that process, right?
The third day in, I felt that exhaustive feeling starting to overcome me and I lacked that feeling of “loving my life” that I’ve become accustomed to. Because I believe the best coaches have coaches, during a conversation with my coach, this topic came up and I was reminded that my “JOB” in life is to have fun. To enjoy what I want to enjoy and my “WORK” is to have clear visions for what I want. Upon realizing this, I took the time to do the work that I teach my clients and upon completing my vision, I spent the day having fun. I rode my motorcycle to this really cool little town about an hour away for breakfast, when I got back home, I drove to a botanical garden, met some friends for “A Course in Miracles” class and enjoyed a healthy lunch in a cute little town I hadn’t discovered until that day.
During my drive home, I received a phone call from a young man who was stuck in life and asked for my assistance as a coaching client. NUMBER 1. When I arrived home, there were two emails waiting for me. Not one, but TWO! One was for a speaking engagement and the other was for another potential coaching client, which I’m excited to share is now an active client. OK, now here’s the kicker to it all. Not one of those communications came from my efforts the prior three days. In fact, weeks later, I’ve still not received any business from those days of labor.
My point is this. You will not achieve success simply by efforting it to be. We are “BEINGS”, not “DOINGS” and it’s within the doing, that life is sucked from our beings. So try to take some time this month and give yourself a break from all the daily doings and really allow yourself to “BE.” I’ll bet you will walk away grateful for your experience in doing so and I hope to hear back from you! please feel free to leave a comment or reach out to me at IFGTcoaching@gmail.com
Please feel free to leave a comment or I can be contacted at IFGTcoaching@gmail.com and check out my weekly Coaches Corner Video at My U-Tube Channel.
Joseph A. Drolshagen
IFGT Life Coaching, LLC
Author: Lifes Lessons
“Life is intended to be Lived with Passion”
Lean back and listen to the AUDIO version of this article: