Yes, I have fallen, and I have gotten back up. It is not always pleasant to fall, in the literal sense anyway, It can be rather painful. It can also be most annoying to fall in the business world. One day you are at the top of your game and the next, you are hurling, at breakneck speed, down that ladder you just climbed. Now, one might argue that falling in love is a rather joyous experience, so perhaps this may be the one exception. Yet, the one thing we can all agree upon is that falling, under whatever condition, knocks us off balance.
It is when we are out of balance that we are faced with the choice of finding balance again. How long we take to regain our balance, makes all the difference in the world as to how long we stay down. If our emotions are any indicator, we can stay down a very long time. Depression can set in and we’ll wallow in the mire. Getting used to the mire means we make excuses to justify why this is where we’d rather be and certainly, no one really believes that, not even you!
So, why stay complacent in limbo land? Because there’s less chance of getting hurt again when we are not willing to risk getting hurt again. No one wants a broken body, failed career or reputation for being unlucky at love. It’s much easier to say that you’d rather be safe than sorry. Besides, you’ve been there, done that and have the tee shirt in which to sleep. Next life chapter, please.
Well, let’s look at a recent fall of mine and yes, it was a literal tumble. I was trapped in my physical circumstances, not only because of where I fell but because my body didn’t have the capability to right itself. We had to call First Responders to come to my aid. They were brilliant and had me back on my feet in record time. There was some loss of blood as I cut both my head and lower lip open. Several scrapes and bruises appeared here and there but they were nothing compared to the head game I experienced.
See, I fell while coming up off the toilet in my bathroom. I had, only hours earlier, a new riser and seat installed, and I was on it for the first time since. The old set had been in such bad shape, that I had to create a way to lift myself off, requiring that I practically launch myself into an upright position. My knees do not work like everyone else’s, so this is the main reason for the riser and why the gymnastics. Well, not expecting the difference in height, meant that I was not prepared for altering my dismount and I pretty much flung myself onto the ceramic floor. Upon landing, I wacked my head on the concrete base of my shower and face planted onto the floor, hence breaking open my lower lip.
Once I was up, walking and getting around rather well, I was faced with need to get back on the toilet. Yeah, not something I really wanted to do. I live with my siblings, so I asked my sister to be right there with me, when I got up, to make sure I would be okay. Not that she could have stopped me from falling again but it seemed like the right thing to do at the time. It was harrowing because I couldn’t stop myself from being afraid. But the prospect of spending the rest of my life seated upon that toilet was not on my radar, so I finally figured out how to stand up without falling. Naturally, my sister offered to be there as many times as she could, all I had to do was let her know. I was grateful.
The next morning, as I sat there doing my business, I thought about calling out to her so she could, as she put it, “spot me” when it dawned on me that this was NOT the way to go. At some point, whether I was totally comfortable, I had to learn how to get up off that toilet without a guardian. Easier said than done. I had to believe I could do it, that was the key!
I shook. I grimaced. I began to hyperventilate. I tensed up. I screamed. I cried. All, in the name of summoning the courage to dismount easily. While I eventually did manage to get up, shaking knees and all, it took a few days to release the intense fear. Bit by bit, I found myself being able to execute my moves to where I trusted that I would be okay. After all, this is one function, one cannot get through the day without. Nature calls and answer we must!
I share this experience because I want to encourage you to face your fear. I would like to inspire you to allow yourself to do whatever you have to do, to grow beyond the complacency of thinking that staying down is more comfortable than rising. Sure, I could have used a bedpan, asked for help all the time and basically never used that toilet again. The scary thing is that people would have understood and allowed me to have my way. After seeing me on that floor, and watching me go through the rescue process, my sister would have done anything to ensure I never had to go through that again.
What made the difference? I knew that I couldn’t handle that decision. I knew that I would, eventually, be destroyed not because of another fall, but by the fear. My desire to overcome the fear had to be stronger than my desire to not have to face that fear again. Yet, I was facing fear, each time. Not in a “dare devil” sort of way, but in a “come on, it’s time to learn something new” way. I allowed myself to be scared but then I also took the opportunity to talk myself through the process. Know what? I got up each time. Sometimes shaking, but each time filled with gratitude.
Whatever knocks you down, you do not have to stay there! Wherever you find yourself, no matter the circumstances, if you want to rise above them, you can! You may fall many times in your life, so falling is not the enemy here. Falling is an opportunity to prove to yourself that you can get up one more time!